Posts Tagged ‘bob garner’

For those in the corporate world who have to travel to earn their pay, many times we find ourselves in the presence of unpleasant people.

From plane trips to restaurants to meetings or events, an occasional rude person expresses his or her discomfort at something we may have said or should have said or did or didn’t do.

Sometimes their unhappiness is expressed by a few choice words, a nasty look, or – if we are driving and someone feels we are not driving fast enough – the mere dexterity of their fingers communicates the message. Hopefully, you don’t feel compelled to respond to this form of communication, other insults or goofy looks that others throw your way. It’s easy to respond; however, it’s more challenging – if not rewarding – to not respond. The next time you get the urge to respond, remember this story:

Buddha was once asked by his disciples why he didn’t respond to the insults that others would cast toward him. Buddha said, “Imagine what would happen if someone placed a gift at your feet and you chose to ignore it. Or someone sent you a letter and you did not open it.” The disciples answered that it would be returned to the original owner. Buddha responded with one word, “Exactly.”

Just let the anger or insult from another person pass you by, and, like a boomerang, it will have to go back to its owner. That is the one of the best and quickest ways to deal with mean people.

©2014BobGarner – See how these corporations brought the WOW factor to their eventshttp://tinyurl.com/62u2u2y


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Aesop tells a story of a man who owned a donkey. He would offer a ride on his donkey to those who were looking to cross the hot desert. One day, a customer purchased this service and the customer, the man, and the donkey took off across the desert.

After a few hours, the customer who was riding on the donkey decided he wanted to take a break. So, the customer dismounted and, seeing that the donkey cast a nice shadow, sat down in the shade of the beast.

The owner of the donkey was not pleased at this, as he now had to sit in the blazing sun. The owner decided that he wanted the shade of the donkey. So, waiting until his customer fell asleep, the owner moved his donkey a few feet over and sat down in the shade of his donkey, which left his customer in the hot sun.

Sensing the heat that was now barreling down on him, the customer woke up and yelled, “How dare you. I paid for this donkey.” To which the owner replied, “You paid for the donkey, but not the shadow. If you want the shadow as well, you have to pay more.” The two men began to argue and the argument got so heated that the owner of the donkey slapped the customer. The customer slapped him back and they began to fight. The ruckus got so loud that the donkey became frightened and ran off leaving the man and the customer with no donkey and no shade. The two men sat in the burning sun and suffered – all because they were fighting over a shadow.

The art of communication and team building can be a tricky thing. When people argue, they lose track of the desired result. Personally, the cost can be the loss of or damage to a relationship. Professionally, the cost could be the loss of business or a damaged working environment. In either case, during an argument, many people end up fighting over the shadows of their own opinions, agendas, and emotions – instead of looking at a situation logically or listening to the other person’s side of an issue.

What always needs to be kept in mind is the end result. To improve your communicative skills – as well as your teamwork and your productivity skills – the next time an issue arises that could lead to an argument, strive to keep in mind the desired end result. Quietly listen to the other person’s viewpoint and try to refrain from pushing your opinion or agenda. See if you can compromise with the other person.

If it looks like you have come to a complete impasse, then follow the old dictum, “When in doubt, write it out.” Write down the desired goal and then each person’s ideas or views. Discuss these options and write down the “pros” and “cons” of each. Sometimes when you have it “all down on paper,” the proper option to take to achieve the end goal just pops out at you.

Of course, this only works if each person gives up the childish need to “save face” or “always have it their way.” It’s humorous to think we will stop children from acting this way but, as adults, many do the same thing.

Our desert friends acted childishly, and if they would have stayed focused on the desired end result – getting across the desert – sharing the shadow of the donkey would have just come naturally. Keep the shadows of your emotions and opinions in the background and focus on working together to achieve the desired result.

Recognized as a funny motivational speaker who actually has something to say, Bob Garner works with corporations worldwide to improve employee and sales productivity and performance.

©2012 Bob Garner. All Rights Reserved. You may use this article, but you must use the byline and author resource.

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I had the honor of addressing the sales force of Devicor Medical Products the other day.  What a great group! They are a passionate group of people and a delightful audience.  Here is what the Sr. Global VP of Marketing had to say…

If you’re looking for a funny motivational keynote speaker for your next event, give me a call. To see more funny motivational speakers video testimonials go here: http://bobgarneronline.com/testimonials.php

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